its ok to not be ok

The last few weeks have been the worst weeks of my life. My family and I have had to deal with something we never thought we would have to go through. But, it has made me realise the impact and commonality of mental health and why there is so much more that can be done.

My gorgeous cousin decided it was time for him to pass onto another world, leaving us all heartbroken. I haven’t stopped crying in 2 weeks and I am not entirely sure I will stop. I just cannot believe it. But, in true me style, in order to grieve, I write. I write what I am feeling, hence this post.

Mental health is nothing to be ashamed of. It is more than ok to not be ok. I know this is easier said than done, but talk to someone. Your mum, sister, stranger, pet, whoever, but if you can seek help, it will help you.

I now have a big interest in mental health and raising awareness for mental illnesses. I truly admire all those suffering with mental illness. There is seriously nothing more terrifying than battling with your own mind everyday. I cannot begin to imagine what it is like, waking up every morning knowing that all those problems and thoughts are still there, and you cannot always ‘just sleep it off’. And then having to face each day with all those thoughts.

It is important that we all look out for our friends, team-mates and family, making sure they are ok, or not ok. It may just save someones life. Suicide may be the solution at the time, but it is not the answer. I will do anything to make sure I can raise awareness to save some lives. Even if this means going way out of my comfort zone, doing something like running a marathon (watch out 2019), or playing basketball!

I am completely heartbroken and speechless.