I AM BORED

hello and welcome back! as I now have a lot of time on my hands, I have decided to start writing a range of blogs, so I can post more regularly, (so I say)!

but the focus of todays blog, is coping with an injury. As many of you know (if you read my last blog, which I hope you have, you would know), that I had a little fall at netball. I was initially told I had tore my ACL, but I am now aware that this no longer the case. I saw an orthopaedic surgeon during the week, and I was told that I actually have a Tibia Fracture. According to google, ‘The tibia, or shinbone, is the most commonly fractured long bone in the body. A tibial shaft fracture occurs along the length of the bone, below the knee and above the ankle. It typically takes a major force to cause this type of broken leg.’ ┬áSo yes, I have fractured this.

This is good news!!! This means that I am on my crutches for 4 weeks, and not allowed to put ANY pressure on my left leg at all, but I may not need surgery (yay!!). I am going back to see the surgeon in 6 weeks to see how the rehab/progress s going and then we will decide whether surgery is needed. I can tell you right now, it is super hard not to put any weight on my leg, like merely impossible…. Side note, I rolled my ankle last night (my right ankle – has been an occurring injury for me lately as well), so am now pretty crippled on both legs…. I go from icing my knee, to ankle, back to knee etc. I live a very exciting life!

But, back to the knee… so when I was told this, I was happy. But I was also upset. 4 weeks? Does that mean I can’t work for 4 weeks? I can’t grocery shop? I can’t basically do anything. I am going to die. For anyone who knows me, I can’t sit still. I can’t sit and watch Netflix for hours – I get sooo bored. I can only watch one movie and like a max of 2 episodes at once. I have to be doing something else. it could be snacking, on my phone, or like doing uni work, I just have to be busy. So you can probably already tell that I am going to struggle to stay put for 4 weeks…..

AND I also have the trouble of living in a double story house. Like these are all practical and well when you can walk on both legs, but when you are crippled.. who in their right mind thought building two houses on top of each other would be practical when someone is injured??? jeez… Like I have basically been living in the lounge room down stairs, as it is just too painful to keep walking up and down stairs. Plus its close to the freezer for my regular icing… my knee still looks like a balloon, gross.

I have had to take 4 weeks of work, which means no money, which also means that I won’t actually be able to afford to do much else. So I will literally be sitting at home. All day. For 4 weeks. I am already dreading this. Keeping active, healthy and busy is like my life. So imagine how I am feeling now this has all been taken away from me. I just don’t know how to feel. I’m lost. I’m unsure. I’m angry. I’m bored.

I AM SO BORED. I get messages from people asking how I am. The classic reply I send is something about how I am still really sore but I AM BORED. I can’t do anything. I hardly have any uni anymore, I hardly leave the house and if I do, its for an appointment. Nothing fun. I can’t even stand up longer than 10 minutes to do the dishes without being in pain and telling myself “their should be no weight on your left leg courtney”, but unfortunately I still need to live. I still need to cook. I still need to eat and shower. I feel like my world has stopped. But it hasn’t.

Its time like this, I wished I lived closer to family. I am alone. Yes, I do have friends, but they are all busy. I can’t expect people to just drop everything to help me. That isn’t fair. But just being able to spend time with family, where I don’t feel like such a burden, would be nice. It is times like these, where I start to feel excited about my future, about next year.

Thank you for reading and for the messages I received from my last blog. They all mean the world to me. Thank you XX

 

 

im such an idiot…

wow – what a weekend. Again, I am very sorry for not posting last week, but I can guarantee that this post will make up for it!

So, I have had a pretty unusual weekend. Yesterday, I woke up (obvs), went to work and went and played my netball game, just like I do every week. I got through the first quarter of netball (which for me, is a miracle in itself. I don’t think I have played one game this season without having to come off because I’ve injured myself). I was playing wing attack, and was ready to get the first centre pass of the second quarter. Next minute, I am on the ground, screaming. I wonder what has happened..

After getting lifted off court, attended to by the first aid officer at the netball courts and then later taken to the Wakefield Sports Clinic, I can confirm that I have torn my ACL – yay. Although, it is only a slight tear, it is still a tear and I can tell you right now I am in a lot of pain lol.

Anyways, I thought I would express how hard it is to do anything!! When I was younger, I used to think that hurting my ankle/leg would be awesome, because I could use crutches and like show them off – I was sooooo wrong. I literally got them earlier today, used them for about 30 minutes and was ready to throw them out the window.

But like, even simple tasks like going grocery shopping, walking down stairs, walking anywhere are just so hard. I had to get my brother to take me grocery shopping today because I had no food and couldn’t go shopping alone… I think i’ll have to start using woolies online now, ah damn.

So from here, I will be seeing an orthopaedic surgeon to discuss whats next. Maybe surgery? or maybe just a lot of rehab. But like my knee looks like a balloon – sooo swollen haha it kinda feels cool to touch, like its all soft and mushy ew. But this also means I cant work for a few weeks – kinda hard to teach kids to swim if I can’t walk (or swim), so I better find some decent movies to watch, because I really can’t do anything else. At all.

I was a little bit upset and depressed yesterday. I was at the hospital by myself and then came home to an empty house. And all I wanted was a tub of ice-cream. But, a) the shops were closed, b) I couldn’t really drive and c) I wasn’t paying $5 delivery on uber eats for a $5 ice cream. So instead, to drown my sorrows, I went to bed… cheaper solution. But today, I have still been a bit down. Just the realisation that I can no longer do some things, I cant go for my long beach walks, I can’t lie in bed because I need to keep going downstairs to get the ice from the freezer and again, I was alone. I have just realised that what were tasks I never had to think about, now are basically impossible to complete. It is going to be a long road to recovery, but I will get there.

So, if anyone is up for a movie night with ice cream, hit me up – thats about all I will be doing for the next month or so.

Thanks for reading and if you have any good Netflix shows to recommend, let me know!! XX